MARK GAMMILL
POETRY - STORIES - NECROSHADE
POETRY PAGE 2
WRITTEN BY MARK GAMMILL
Distant Star
Thinking of you again tonight
staring at a lone and distant star
are you safe and warm I wonder
is there true love where you are.
Our favorite place deep in the woods
a clearing where we’d lay
on a blanket in the tall grass
for hours we would stay
we chose a certain star
to remember or to find
if ever we were parted
forever would remind.
Sitting here looking to the sky
longing for your love again
searching far into the heavens
a hope that will not end.
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Only Goodbye
Her green Colorado license plate
her old red Chevrolet
I gave her a rose inside a car
outside a hard liquor store
but she wanted more
always more.
I drove her home it was late
too much to drink and nothing left to say
our hearts were cold as I held her hand
I knew love wasn’t meant this way.
Broken glass and moonlight
If I’d only known then
from the very start
the promise we’d never part
I thought I knew her heart
but she would let it die
now only goodbye.
The very best of friends I thought
but the best of all was lost
she broke the promise and without hope
there was nothing left unbroke
we both know the dark truth why
now only goodbye.
Standing outside in a late September rain
having lost and found in all the pain
watching her bedroom light go dim
this lie of the heart was sin
and I know she knows why
now only goodbye.
In My Dreams
In my dreams
I see her late at night
In my dreams
her face shining in light
In my dreams
there’s forgiveness and hope
In my dreams
in love her and I both
In my dreams
I give everything I have
In my dreams
we still talk and laugh
In my dreams
there’s peace and joy in her eyes
In my dreams
no one leaves or lies or dies
In my dreams
she’s never too far away
In my dreams
not here alone beside her grave.
Danger
In the face of this danger
was a picture of us
like a kiss from a stranger
that was never enough
when your sure of the end
and do nothing to change
you’ll lose your own soul
with nothing to blame.
The park near your house
the dark skies and rain
we lost all of our trust
never to be the same
the truth of a love
left only to rust
in the face of this danger
was a picture of us.
Fear
I will never understand why you went away
without saying goodbye or the promise of a day
when you and I would meet or speak again
how could you leave with such a cold and bitter end.
My heart will never change and always long for you
while living in the past and searching far into
wishing that your sweet face and voice was present near
beyond these counted days it is without you that I fear.
Season’s Greetings
I thought I’d send you a card
for old times sake
with autumn leaves now falling
remembering together we would rake
do you recall the time
you hid behind the Christmas tree
finding you there
without any clothes
just wearing a bow
wrapped for only me.
While I was searching for your address
and thinking hard about the past
I had so many deep regrets
I know will always last.
Such a joyful time of year
caroler’s singing
children playing in the snow
I wish you were here again
I should have never let you go.
Please accept this simple card from me
and always remember this
you were the greatest gift I ever had
a chance at true love I know I missed.
So Long
Goodbye to you my faithful friend
such a painful loss
a sorrow from which I will never mend
all too brief was the life you lived
so much more to learn and love and give.
The memory of you will always stay
within my thoughts
never fading away
the smile you gave
the heartfelt words
the joyous laugh so often heard
memories are falling now
like a much needed rain
nourishing a broken heart
now feeling the pain
of losing you and all we shared
it always showed how much you cared.
Only God knows why and understands
our lives he holds within his hands
I’ll look for you on that distant shore
where the sun will set on us no more
where the light of God forever shines
and your lasting love again I’ll find.
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Paths
Trying hard to pass this sad and lonely time
chasing away the old dreams
and hoping soon to find
a sure and peaceful way the truth can only bring
still the memory of you shadows over everything.
That night by your house
without love and without grace
remembering the look in your eyes
the expression on your face
how could you bring an end to us
only to a loss
no chance that we might find again
with two paths that never cross.
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Knife
I have to tell you this
our lives not fully lived
a sweet and sad goodbye
is all I have to give.
Between you and I
was seldom something pure
too little without a doubt
too little lasting and sure
but I will so miss holding you
the perfect moments that we shared
that soft and warm familiar place
the sweetest smell of your dark hair.
Watching you walk away
the pain increasing with every step
the truth was lost within your eyes
and in the lies with no regrets.
I bless you for all the tears
and all the pain you stood
I’m so sorry things didn’t change
back when I knew they should
though I didn’t understand
why you left the way you did
you don’t have to me explain
for the truth’s no longer hid.
When the leaves began to fall
and the rain moved with the wind
you saw a better place
regardless of your friend
perhaps another time
when never comes goodbye
and the winter doesn’t chill
or take away the life
I will look for you until
the sun no longer shines
wishing for a different end
while falling on the knife.
Forever
I always wonder how you are
somewhere far away from me
I miss you more than ever
I hope someday I'll see
your sweet and caring face
through my sad eyes again
its not easy never seeing
your best and dearest friend.
We've gone through so much together
and have long been out of touch
but maybe someday we'll find away
because I know it means so much.
We will always have our love
so try and reach me anytime
and I'll listen to your heart
and tell you what's in mine.
It may not be easy on us
but we'll never give up a love
we took so long to build together
and are still writing the story of.
Our story is still evolving
only you and I will ever understand
and we know the truth of all of it
as we slowly walk across the sand.
Reunited now here on a beach
waiting for the distant sun to set
he carefully puts his arm around her
and they never will forget.
As the sun gently begins to fall
and the day soon becomes the night
they'll remember this moment forever
embracing in the disappearing light.
Lost Vegas
Driving all night
I can now see the lights
of Vegas reminding me of you
wanting someone to hold on to
like you and I were
missing her.
Checking into a room
many stories above
lost without love
emptiness surrounds
a heart that was true
in the end I held on to
all of the trust
but she would not fulfill
her promise of.
Bar lights low
I wish I could go where she is
out in the street
the world’s a stranger
people everywhere
I still care for her.
I see her eyes
no its someone else
reminding of
how I always felt
such a foolish heart
so far from home
back to the room
but not alone
with memory of
the truest love
I cannot hold.
Gin
my fateful friend
drinking all night
till the light of day
I know its not the way
but letting go of you
has been so hard to do
with so much left to say.
LA
Straight tequila shots
mez-cal highs
all-night lows
short skirts waiting across the bar
dark lipstick schemes
willing to go as far.
LA high-life
hollywood hills
convertible chevrolets
fast lives on seacliff drive
summer blondes on beaches lay.
Heroin addict dreams
foolish city lights
searching spotlight beams
inner-city gangs
a faithful choir sings
just another sunny day
living in LA.
Distant Love
Wherever you are now
I sure hope you're doing ok
somewhere in this crazy world
maybe somewhere far away
Is there joy in your heart
and a sweet smile on your face
are you safe and warm I hope
in a far distant place.
Is the sun shining down on you
and warm against your skin
will you watch it set soon at a beach
and maybe think of your old friend
when you look at that deep blue ocean
with the waves slowly rolling in
remember that I still love you
and that my love will never end.
Remembering all those talks we had
so beautiful and true
you slowly opened up your heart
and let me really get to know you
always remember I love you
and that will never ever change
we went through so much together
and suffered through all the pain
just know that I’m thinking of you
and pray God will always from above
guide you and protect you
with his pure and forgiving love.
Graveside
I wanted to tell
and let you know
all of the truth
that was never told
and forgive the past
of you and I
the mistakes we made
our sad goodbye.
I always saw
within your eyes
a beautiful truth
and beyond the lies
I wanted to change
what is now our fate
we had a chance
but now its too late.
The grass and dirt
beneath your knees
two souls apart
and will forever be
you knew too well
it could end this way
as rain gently falls
upon my grave.
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Last Of Me
See here the last of me
but my words will always be
not about the want of money or fame
only about the truth of love
the goal to gain.
To help change the past
with a simple pen
to heal our hearts
to begin again
to inspire those that still may care
to anchor those pulled into despair.
A true poet’s life is seldom told
though collected works
are bound and sold
no true profit gained
only misunderstood
if only one mind
could be changed for the good.
Many late night hours
bleeding onto the page
many painfully written words
of a truthful rage
in a slow fading light
I can no longer see
remember these words
the last of me.
No More
The cabin we built
deep in the woods
a reminder of everything
we should have been
constructed to last
against the rain and the wind
like a picture old and gray
we should have remained
but the flood of it all
took you far away.
Pine needles and dust
move across the hard floor
the pain of your loss
has opened the door
a spirit of dread
now enters into this place
without your life here
it fills this dark empty space.
A shelf filled with liquor
left empty again
now paying the price
the wages of sin
a few last words on a page
by faint candlelight
tell of losing a love
and of losing a fight.
A pool on the floor
a dark and deepening red
the smell of gun powder
and the silence of dead
a picture of you
face down on the floor
lost hope and lost love
now gone and no more.
Cell
Unbendable bars
dim and falling stars
the winter chills
warmer where you are.
Words of a new poem
lie crumpled on the floor
unable to find the strength
to write of this no more.
A candle on the wall
begging more and more for life
losing its steady burn
losing its winless fight.
Shadows move across the room
knowing of the time
the end of all
the war of it
never will I find.
In a cell of my own making
having lost the will to fight
thinking of the final words
I know I need to write.
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Memory
Memory
many memories
lost in a photograph
of a time now past
of a love that was real
and time would steal
a second chance
for you and I
to find a way
only now that I can say
my love was true
and always this
a dear sweet kiss
from a faithful heart.
Do you remember us
the way we were
this one will stir
and take you back
a long lost photograph
a bit gray and worn
like you and me
just a memory
just a memory.
Say Goodbye
Say a sad goodbye of letting go
and all I could to try or hope
with another your heart may find a peace
you deserve a chance at love complete.
So now it's yours
the path you choose
what holds in store
is up to you
let go of the pain
and all we took
find the way of truth
you can if you look
say a prayer for us
no more tears to cry
say you will always
and with love
say goodbye.